Post Book Launch: Reflections

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I had a bad cold rolling into the launch of “Follow Me: Tattered Veils.”  It kept me from being as active on social media as I’d planned.  It kept me from feeling either excited or nervous.  Most of me just wanted everything to be over.  It felt like a slow grind towards an inevitable conclusion.  I wasn’t even a little happy, and I don’t feel different now that we launched the book.  

The one bright side to my illness is I also don’t feel let down.  All this time I’ve been pushing for a strong release of “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” and bracing for silence.  It’s been hard to stay so positive and strong while trying to keep expectations low.  Realistically, only my friends, family, and husband’s friends/family will read or buy this book.  And that stings because I’ve gone way out of my comfort zone to promote this book.  I’ve spent a lot of time and energy trying to be friendly and charming and trying to find the right audience to enjoy my book.  And I love “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” like it’s a living person and part of me feels like I’ve failed her.  I’m like that parent that couldn’t figure out how their kid’s skill set could land them a successful career… or I saw that potential, but I couldn’t steer the kid in the right direction.  

Now that I’m recovering from the cold, I feel like there’s all this lost time to make up for.  I’ve got all these posts on writing and goals I have for 2020, and I haven’t hit most of them.  I have to face it: I won’t meet a lot of my goals (writing and otherwise).  And it’s leaving me feeling desperate to make up for lost time.  

I’m anxious to write, and it’s been so long, the creative writing part of my brain feels rusty and misused.  

So now you want me.  When I was romping and playing in the background, shouting for you to stop and write, you didn’t have time or you felt too sick, but now you want me just to appear on demand.  Well, good luck.  

People talk about “recovering from the book launch” and I’m sitting here and laughing because I am literally recovering from being sick as much as the nerves of the launch and the pressure to be “on”.  But some things I’m trying to keep in mind as I move forward:

1. Be kind to me.  There’s stuff that’s fucked up this book and it’s too late to take it back.  I need to forgive myself for any missteps or things I didn’t do or know to do for this launch.  

2. Don’t linger.  I need to get up and move the fuck on.  I’ve got two major drafts I’m working on.  I have a novella I’d love to find a sensitivity beta reader for and I would love love love love love to self publish it.   I work a full-time job, I have a dog and a husband and I have all this work I want to do.  I can’t wallow in lost time.  And I can’t wait for my creative side to be ready, I might need to force it a little until I find my routine.

3.  The book is out and published.  Same way I didn’t wake up and have a complete novel ready to publish, I can’t expect people just come in to buy it.  It will be a war of attrition to make back the money spent or to get people to read and enjoy the book.  

4. It’s not 100% over.  I have a few more promotional blogs to write/publish.  AND starting March 15th I launch “Roxi’s Podcast” where I do a read along for “Follow Me: Tattered Veils.”  My intentions are to reward early adopters of this story with some further insight into the creation and meaning of the story AND to entice some readers who are on the fence.  My team and I pre-recorded most of the podcasts, but we have at least two or three more to record.

Looking for more posts about the writing and publishing process?  Check out more posts on my novel publication process: Going Through Copy Edits, 1st Daft vs 2nd Draft, Goal Planning: Getting Through the First Draft, My Character Looks Nothing Like My MC, Cover Art: Truth in Advertising, and Post Book Launch: Reflections.  

Want to know more about my novel?  Check out my childhood stories recapping themes in my life I hope prepared me to write this book: Remember the Magic of Santa?, Closet Monsters: Gone too Far?, and Garden Gnomes and other Evils.

OR check out my series where I find similarities between my novel and other popular media.  Hopefully it gives you a better idea whether there are elements in my book you may enjoy. Lost Girl Comparison, American Gods Comparison, and The O.A. Comparison.

MY BOOK IS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON!!!  Please go look at "Follow Me: Tattered Veils" and see if it might be a story that interests you.

2019 In Review! Did I Meet My Goals?

Me and Roxi in Big Spring Park all rights reserved

In January last year I set up some personal writing goals.  For fun I want to review them and see what I accomplished vs what needs work.

Accomplished: 

I wanted to finish my second draft of Follow Me: Tattered Veils and succeeded (what's the difference between the 2 drafts?  Talked about that here). More than that!  This year I:

-Sent Tattered Veils off to a copy editor (some further blogging about that experience here) 

-Made the corrections from the copy editor

-Have a Copywrite on Tattered Veils—which means a copy of my work will be available in the Library of Congress

-Commissioned a cover artist and have cover art complete for Tattered Veils

-Got a publishing team together and have that team:

       -Created a website for me and a landing page for Tattered Veils and future works

       -Created an author’s Facebook page

       -Discussed, created, and sent A.R.C.s (advanced reader copies) to people for an early review

       - Had a proof copy of my novel in my hands

       -Chose a date of publication (and I’m thrilled to announce I will self publish Follow Me: Tattered Veils on Amazon this Feb the 29th a leap year ^_^)

I taught a free Intro to Creative Writing class with Ashley and we plan to run our course again this year.  It is exciting to continue refining our class. Hopefully this class will turn into a way we can give back to the writing community, inspire other writers, and create a closer community of people with similar goals.

I met my book reading goals for 2019 and reviewed most of the books I read (check out my Goodreads profile).  I also created shelves for my read Goodreads books so they are easier for other readers to sort through.  

2019 was a great year for esoteric folklore.  I learned about this thing called “#folklorethursday” on Twitter and it’s awesome.  The community connecting and telling different little bits of trivial there is soooooo cool.  I read a couple great pagan books that reconnected me earth based traditions, some will even work in my southern environment even if British weather is colder and rainier.  I also had the chance to write up a bit of info on traditional holidays and some different writing prompts to accompany the holidays.  My well for inspiration seems full.

Opportunities: 

I didn’t maintain a constant blogging habit.  At my personal blog, I posted about 11 times.  I posted 12 times in the N.A.W.G. blog.  Along with less frequent posting, I’ve dropped the ball in my social media game.  This may have cost me an audience or sense of reliability.  I promise I’ve been very busy in my writing life, it just hasn’t all been on display for the people who might watch at home.

My goals for blogging and social media were too lofty.  Given how much socializing even online takes out of me and given how each blog post takes time I could write creatively off the table, it was never realistic I would both complete my Tattered Veils goals and maintain an active blog presence.  No regrets over which I chose.  Now I have a book, if I’d stuck with the blog who knows how far away holding a copy of my work would have been?  

While blogging and social media has to play a role in my writing goals, it will have a lighter touch in 2020.  If these posts help or interest other people, I see it as “worth it,” but I can’t say this style of writing is a “passion" of mine.

I kept making new goals for myself as the year went on.  Some of that was beneficial and some of it was a time waste under the guise of “being efficient.”  There were days  that planning took the place of “doing”—so not the goal of making plans.  As this new year rolls in, I plan to compromise with the person who wants to plan vs the person who wants to do work.  More on that in 2020 goals though.  

Overall, I think I had a powerful 2019, even if it wasn’t everything I wanted.  How did your year go?  What was a major accomplishment for you?  What was a major failing?  What are your plans for 2020?

Not sure how to create good yearly plans?  Try my post that helps break down goal planning.  Or try a post I have exploring Habitica and how it can help you meet your goals. 

Curious about my my 2020 goals, check out this post!  Wondering how I track my goals?  I've written more here.

Going Through Copy Edits!

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My Copy Editor, Kristy Stewart of Looseleaf Tea returned my manuscript this past Wednesday!

As long-term readers and friends may suspect, I’ve been too keyed up to do much new writing (blogging/creative/ect).  But, I committed to post once a week on each of my blogs so let me offer some editing observations.  

1. I am over the moon with excitement.  Didn’t know it was humanly possible to be so energetically happy so long, figured it would burn something in my system out.  

2. It’s taking longer to approve/reject changes than I expected.  Mark up on a word document can be difficult to see if it’s a single comma (and I’m missing a lot of those).  It’s also tedious any time my editor makes a period a comma or a comma a period because I have to approve 3 changes individually (agree to delete the original punctuation, agree to accept the new punctuation and agree to capitalization or lower case of the following word).

3. There're fewer edits than I expected.  Not a knock on Kristy, her work is thorough.  I just mentally set my mind back into English paper mode.  I never scored well on those in school.

4. The recommended edits are a continuation of work I’ve already done.  She suggests a lot of verbs tense change, and I’ve changed a million verb tenses a million times already.  I still missed some or changed them incorrectly.  I would never get these tense right without outside eyes, so that alone is worth my money.

5. There are open-ended comments.  Like “this is confusing for X reason. Consider clarifying.”  

6. I don’t know how/when to hyphen words together.  When I’m done with these edits, I’m rereading those rules.  

7.  Even though she was copy editing, there are little gems that show what a strong grasp of character and plot Kristy has.  So far, she’s made two suggestions to add a line of dialogue here or there that should have been obvious fixes for me, but I needed someone to suggest.

8. She’s suggestion : and ; but I’m rejecting them still.  I’m aware of what grammar says about these things, but I have an ever expanding list of why these two kinds of punctuation do not belong in fictional prose (funny coming from someone who is using a colon in their book’s title). 

9. She’s adding some “that” back into my writing and she’s starting some of my sentences with And or But.  Both elements I culled due to massive overuse.  It’s nice when someone else sprinkles them in.

10.  In a few notable places where my writer’s group asked me to change something, and I held onto it for detailed reason X, Kristy asked for the same changes.  My writers’ group will be happy to know I capitulated.  

11. Even though I use breath and breathe all the time in my stories, I don’t know when to use which. 🙄

12. Toward vs Towards also comes up a lot.  Maybe reread rules with when to use an s?

Talk to me.  Where are you in your writing process?  What kind of feedback do you get from beta readers or writing groups? What kind of feedback do you get from your copy editor?  What’s your best experience with an editor?  What was your worst experience with an editor?

Looking for more posts about the writing and publishing process?  Check out more posts on my novel publication process: Going Through Copy Edits, 1st Daft vs 2nd Draft, Goal Planning: Getting Through the First Draft, My Character Looks Nothing Like My MC, Cover Art: Truth in Advertising, and Post Book Launch: Reflections.  

Want to know more about my novel?  Check out my childhood stories recapping themes in my life I hope prepared me to write this book: Remember the Magic of Santa?, Closet Monsters: Gone too Far?, and Garden Gnomes and other Evils.

OR check out my series where I find similarities between my novel and other popular media.  Hopefully it gives you a better idea whether there are elements in my book you may enjoy. Lost Girl Comparison, American Gods Comparison, and The O.A. Comparison.

MY BOOK IS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON!!!  Please go look at "Follow Me: Tattered Veils" and see if it might be a story that interests you.

1st Draft Vs 2nd Draft

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Long time readers may recall in 2016, I completed my first draft of Follow Me: Tattered Veils.  Only I didn’t know it was my first draft, I thought my manuscript was complete and began to query agents.  

I did this even though I was not happy with my first chapter and knew it was a bad hook.  

I did this even though I knew the manuscript rambled and barely held together as a story.

I did this even though my main character is unlikeable and awkward. 

How could I call the manuscript complete with these huge flaws?  How could I query?  It’s simple: I’ve always loved Follow Me: Tattered Veils and I had taken the manuscript as far as I knew how to carry it.  Isn’t selling the next step?  

I shudder at my ignorance, but I didn’t know what I didn’t know.  I wrote other stories, and I workshopped Follow Me: Tattered Veils in between.  After letting it rest about a year, I began rewrites.

Where the first draft came out in patches over the course of two years, with multiple deleted scenes only I’ve read.  I finished the second draft in nine months.  My planning and speed increased.  It took a year of thinking, but I knew better than ever what story I wanted to tell.

So what’s different? 

The order, I’ve joined “kick ass first chapter club.”  My plot.  Follow Me: Tattered Veils tells two stories.  The first draft told Gerry’s story, but I needed to develop Roxi’s.  No one liked Roxi because no one knew her well.  The second draft opens up and gives Roxi time to be herself.

  

  

I wrote twelve new chapters.  Of the twelve new chapters, eight are Roxi centric.  Sharing more social interactions, scenes, and pivotal moments in her life.  These moments create chemistry in my cast.

 Beyond those eight Roxi centric chapters, two of those chapters are about Gerry discovering new insights into Roxi.  So audiences get Gerry’s twisted narration of Roxi where Roxi would be more tight-lipped.  What Gerry says about Roxi isn’t gospel truth, but it has a certain ring of truthiness.  I’m using the audience’s interest in Gerry to make them interested in Roxi.  *Does and evil victory dance*

These were my “big changes,” but the second draft overhauled everything.  Awkward wording, repetitive phrasing, and verb tense shifts are some elements I tackled.  I clarified each of my character’s voices.  I deleted massive amounts of their “thoughts” and made the few casual insights have depth.  

Why talk about this now?  I wanted to write about my drafting process and insights while I drafted, but I feared pausing the process would derail my work.  Now as I wait on my copy editor I have nothing but time to reflect.  

Talk to me.  What does your drafting process look like?  What are the biggest changes from first draft to second draft?  Are you like me where you believe each itteration is the “final” product or do you have a better sense of when your WIP is done?

Looking for more posts about the writing and publishing process?  Check out more posts on my novel publication process: Going Through Copy Edits, 1st Daft vs 2nd Draft, Goal Planning: Getting Through the First Draft, My Character Looks Nothing Like My MC, Cover Art: Truth in Advertising, and Post Book Launch: Reflections.  

Want to know more about my novel?  Check out my childhood stories recapping themes in my life I hope prepared me to write this book: Remember the Magic of Santa?, Closet Monsters: Gone too Far?, and Garden Gnomes and other Evils.

OR check out my series where I find similarities between my novel and other popular media.  Hopefully it gives you a better idea whether there are elements in my book you may enjoy. Lost Girl Comparison, American Gods Comparison, and The O.A. Comparison.

MY BOOK IS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON!!!  Please go look at "Follow Me: Tattered Veils" and see if it might be a story that interests you.

Betting On Myself

image from openclipart.org by j4p4n

The Problem

Things are crazy in my professional life right now.  My “day job” is in shambles (from my perspective to them everything is the best it’s ever been or at least that’s the party line they are sticking too) and since that’s forty hours of my work week my emotional/mental life is shredded.  I feel like half a person, and that person is always on the attack, hunting for weaknesses in others to pounce on.  There’s no turning the snarky, angry, lashing aspect of myself off.  Something people don’t get: if you are a compassionate intuitive soul, you can take that knowledge and use it to be vicious.

In the middle of what for me is the worst three going on four months I’ve experienced in the last five years, I have to step back and ask myself “What can I do?”  I can’t change the policies happening at my work.  I can’t control how they are implemented.  I can’t force peers, superiors, or team members below me to be the right people to enact this cultural shift within the company.  But if you know me, there is no way in hell, I will sit back and let them wreck me without pushing back.

The Solution 

So first of the all, I’ve rejected the incompetent management and have turned around to challenge every move they make, using their own guide against them.  If I have to follow these rules, everyone will get on page now.  I will not struggle while everyone else tells me that “this is different”, and it’s “just this once”.


How I'm Choosing Me First

It’s time to come back to what I love.  What makes me passionate is writing.  I’m turning inward, back to words, and I’m turning all that frantic energy into creating space for my creative work to stand.

I’m unhappy, but part of me sees this work drama is the best thing that could have happened.  Nothing short of working at a huge corporate place that’s just shitting all over itself would have made me say: “If this is a thing, then I’m rejecting you and going back to my base.”

I’ve done a lot and continue to do a lot since I’ve turned back to reading and writing.  I’m reading more now than I ever have in my adult life, and I love that part of my life (check out my Goodreads reviews and stats here and see my "Best of Kindle Unlimited Series").  I’m writing (though mostly blogs and tweets) about 10,000 words a week.  My blog(s) pre-scheduled posts are insane.

I tried something new with the Writers’ Group where we each share a Halloween based flash fiction this month.  Chris Palmer finished and scheduled his story first.  Can I say, I appreciate how my fellow writers are stepping in and joining me on this new adventure?  I can’t express how grateful

I’ve noticed this conversation game trend on Twitter and I want in on that.  Right now I play with #theMerryWriter and #authorconfession but I’d like to play in some other Hashtag parties/conversations and I would LOVE to host a Hashtag game through NAWG.

I have more ideas and more planning than ever in my creative writing life.  I’m working in a class (the class itself isn’t going great, I’m waiting to give a full review), trying to get beta reading for the second draft of my novel “Follow Me: Tattered Veils”.  While discussing the book with my friend Ashley Sanders, I had a major break through.  Now I know what I need to do to pull the work together that I am beyond excited to dig in and execute.

Ashley and I are also experimenting with running our own writing class.  We’re talking structure and what value we could add to other writers along with all the inspiration they may bring us.  I can’t wait to work with her.  We have a very similar process and goals for our novels, and I’d love to help other people work through what their goals are.

I have an outline for a co-writing novel gig called “Familiar” with a friend in the North Alabama Writers’ Group and I’m thrilled to bits about working more with the wonderful Zach Standfield to create something cool together.

I have never chased so many avenues at once and it’s occurred to me that my job and my lack joy in my professional life brought me to a place where I had to roll the dice on my projects I'm passion about that I would normally keep as quiet background gigs.  My story telling, my ideas, my ability to network.  Stuff I’m “good” at that I figured would never amount to anything.  It feels powerful to see how things I love could bring me an ounce of professional success.  All my life, people have told me my writing would “never amount to anything” and that I “should focus on something that will make me financially stable.”  Here I am, at the worst point in my professional career, with nothing to draw on.  In desperation, I‘ve opened myself up to this blogging, social media, creative writing thing, and it seems like these “useless“ skill set has breathed new life in me.

The path to monetization is opening and new opportunities rise on the horizon.  They are taking time and persistence, but I’m seeing incremental steps towards my long-term goals. It feels like I’m proving all those people who told me my skills and me through association were “nothing special” and “not valuable” wrong.

Have you ever been in a terrible situation at your job or life where you needed to get out?  What did you do?  Are there other angles I’m not exploring?  Did you ever follow your passion regardless of the money or the risk?  What was the outcome?  Do you have advice/regrets/victory stories?  Talk to me.

I Have Trouble Naming: My Novel's Title

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I’m terrible at naming anything. My dog’s name is Willow, and she’s called that because that’s what the shelter I got her from was calling her.  She was a puppy, and she hadn’t been there long enough she was responding to that name or any of that junk people say to justify keeping a name.  It relieved me that Willow was pretty and ubiquitous enough I didn’t have to come up with something else.  Poor thing would have been stuck with Spot, Shadow, or Puppy if I’d had to name her.

To no one’s surprise, my novel had no title during its first draft.  I called the draft saves “Portraits of Roxi Starr”....which couldn’t be the novel’s title because it’s boring and untrue, but it described the iterations I was working on, so go me?

Then I worked with my first beta reader on this project.  This person had a problem with my main character, Roxi.   She found Roxi’s personality abrasive (which yeah, that’s intended), but it went deeper than that.  The person didn’t like Roxi’s worldview, didn’t like her religion, and didn’t like the way Roxi expressed herself.

I think this person made the classic mistake of thinking Roxi was a version of me.  While I find Roxi is relatable and interesting, she is not me.  I put Roxi in a situation similar to ones I’ve been in, but Roxi handled them in a way I never would.   Where I always approach interactions seeking to avoid confrontation, Roxi escalates.  She likes to fight.  And sometimes that’s the right call, but most of the time, her outcomes are unsuccessful.

 Finally, I got fed up and was like “Look, you don’t like her, great.  People read books with unlikable characters all the time.  I need to know if you can follow her.  As a writer I’m saying ‘Here’s Roxi, here’s her life and now we’re going with this.  Follow her. ‘ Can you suspend your judgement on her as a human being and just follow her to see where the story leads?”

Follow me, ended up sticking.  Outside my argument with the beta reader, the book is about a fae stalking my main character.  He’s literally following her.  In the first draft, the reader was on a forced march to follow Roxi through her life.  In the second pass, I’m softening that element (and I think that might have been what my beta reader wanted) and better easing the reader into who Roxi is.  To do that, the reader is creeping along with our antagonist.  Following.

Roxi’s journey is physical through our normal world and into the Faery Realm.  Readers are passengers riding with Roxi.

Last, Roxi is sarcastic and sassy.  I could just hear her mocking some of her peers cheery social media chant of “like and follow me for more content!”  I always hear the title in meta mocking tones and sometimes I slip up and say my title with that element of self aware loathing.  “This is who we are, desperate attention seekers.  It is always a popularity contest, and it’s not even about liking, just F--ing follow me through the content.”   The ironic thing, I can’t tell you if these are Roxi’s words or mine.  We share a fear that to get other people to be interested in our story, we become that which we see is wrong in the world.  Both of us would bubbly announce “Hashtag fail fast!” the difference is that I would immediately turn away and leave the listener to decide if I were really cheery or if I was speaking in a sarcastic and self depreciating manner.  Roxi would stand her ground and stare at her audience until her disgust pierced through their skull.  She’s not funny and ambiguous, she makes a stand and is always ready to fight over it.

Talk to me.  How did you come up with your title?  Do you come up with titles easily?  Have you ever had a reader assume you were your main character?  Have you written a story where you were the main character?  And last but not least, what do you do to champion your book?  Do you market and how?  Do you ever worry you’re “selling out” or “shilling” for your book?

Real World Obsessions that Make it Into my Writing: Faith and Religion

image from openclipart.org by GDJ

Confession time!  I am a religious zealot.  I mean all in, no turning back, if we ever speak about my beliefs, it is full in your face I am right.  And I have crazy rules/beliefs (all religions do).  My zealotry rarely comes up in conversation because part of my faith is that I believe proselytizing is one of the most heinous and immoral acts a person can perform.  It falls under an act of mental and spiritual violence and is an anathema.

My passion for faith structures and a more open religious community is more seen in my writing than in my conversations.  In my short stories.  Magic/divinity works in direct and obvious ways on my fictional worlds.

In “The Undertaking”, I have my main character, Nimgauna, go on a spirit quest to find her personal power.  This short story is a metaphor for what I think belief should be about: finding your personal truth.  Religion should be a personal journey based on your experiences that informs how your view the world and how you respond to challenges.  Ideally, you have a great guide advisor who has your best interests at heart.  They suggest, they don’t make demands on the outcome of the journey.

“The Undertaking” explores other religious elements.  It asks if the ends justify the means, and what kinds of ways can people be the change they want to see in the world.

Another short story I wrote, “Blood Moon”, introduces readers to what a real and working coven of witches might look like.  The people I introduce in this minority faith run the gambit.  Some of them are elderly, others work professional day jobs, and at least one of them struggles with their mental health/ability to function in a normal society.  The story descends into a horror/fantasy.  Someday, I’d like to write a follow up about all the different ways we as a society should have intervened so the conclusion of “Blood Moon” could have been cheery instead of dark and angry.

“Blood Moon” speaks to the frustration minority faiths have in a Christian-dominated society.  Pushed to fringes, questioned, always playing an ambassador of their faith, and forced to find fellowship in the “other”, even if it’s an imperfect union.


My novel, “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” has the most religious elements of all my stories.  If “Pagan Fiction” were a genre like “Christian Fiction”, that’s how I would describe the work.  It explores so many modern interpretations of paganism, follows a practicing pagan, and has the ‘fantasy’ element of a fae stalking and trying to capture Roxi.  Fantasy is in quotes because I am mirroring a lot of classic mythology in the book.

Supernaturalbeings at work in our universe fascinates me.  “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” offers one look at what life might be like if these beings were more interactive with humanity.  It’s thrilling and terrifying.

Collectively, I spent months in researching folklore and different pagan beliefs.  I created a personalized religion for my main character, Roxi.  Devotion is her defining characteristic, and it forces Roxi to stand apart from everyone else in her world.  What does a person do when the beliefs they hold most dear isolate them from others?  Is her religion hurting or helping her?  I hope readers are asking these questions about Roxi and themselves.

So how do I sell a “Pagan Fiction” book to a Christian market?  Will the religious questing and pursuit come across to readers?  And even if people get it, will the minority faith structures be compelling?  Is it too liturgical?  I was eager to get into beta readers and learn what landed.  It felt like a big risk for me to write this “urban fantasy” where so little of the elements were fantastic.  The rituals and spells are all real and I portray the results so one might experience them in the real world (i.e. is that underwhelming to the typical fantasy reader).  The Gods and fae I portray are “real” in the sense that I extended their mythology.  I didn‘t give them new powers or different personalities/motives.  Every herb, gesture, and symbol has a wealth of history behind its choice.

It relieved me when the feedback came in.  My beta readers said “this is a deeply religious and theological book.” In retrospect, I shouldn’t have been concerned.  “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” wasn’t too narrow for readers to relate, and I could use my book to have conversations with other people I’d never dreamed of expressing.  It was magical.

Were their issues in the first draft of “Follow Me: Tattered Veils”, you bet.  Pacing, pacing, pacing.  A lot of setup in the front and all rollercoaster drops in the back.  It also turns out people want a little more exposition, or they want it in different places than I’ve dumped it.  The whole front third needs to be re-written and the most liturgical part of the book, a pagan meet up where many practicing pagans share opposing views, needs to transform because it’s not doing what it needs to do and it introduces too much that doesn’t matter in my book.

Can you read this book and never think about religion?  Absolutely!  “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” is currently 76,000 word book and explores a lot of themes where religion is just one, but you can read it as straight fantasy about a woman being stalked, abducted, and attempting to escape the clutches of a creepy obsessive fae creature.  What’s cool about Roxi being pagan: she’s an informed combatant.  She knows fae folklore, so she knows where to be wary and she has ideas of what’s waiting for her on the other side of the veil.

Talk to me.  What parts of your personality show in your writing?  Do you embrace those elements or try to downplay them?  Do readers notice themes and elements in your story, or is it a secret author Easter Egg?

Progress Report: All the Good (and Bad) Numbers

image from open clipart.org by Firkin

Twitter Numbers 

Per Twitter Analytics: I've been active on Twitter 18 days and have 192 tweets.  I've had 483 profile visits, gained 97 new followers, and 36 mentions.

My engagement averages about 2% which is an increase from my 1.5% last week.  That engagement averages about 1 link click per day, 2 RT a day, 11 likes, and 1 reply per day.

What does this tell me?  First my follow increase seems strong.  20% of everyone who checks out my profile follows.  This suggests I'm doing well finding relevant quality content to retweet and I'm sorting it well with the Hashtag system to direct my Tweets to the right people at the right time.

I'm on track to gain 100 followers every month.  Remember my following count when I reactivated was 347.  My following has grown 22% in 18 days and that's a lot.

I'm midrange active on Twitter.  I have 5 planned posts a day and everything else is impulsive gravy.  What takes off is a mix of planned posts and impulsive ones.  It averages out to 10 ish posts a day.  They debate the life span of a Tweet but it seems to range between 8-30 minutes.  At the most generous range, I should post twice an hour.  I'd NEED to buy a subscription to a Tweet scheduler to achieve this without going crazy.  I'm looking different options, but I would like 30 days of Twitter before investing.  More details on schedulers I looked at coming.

As a writer and blogger, my link clicks are terrible.  If I can't entice people to check out the posts with interesting titles and snippets, then I need to post links more often to make up for the low conversation.  I'm not comfortable doing that just yet because I feel like my blogs need more evergreen content before I dive into more aggressive self promotion.

General Clean up notes: I've cleared all inactive accounts from my Twitter feed.  Will address again in thirty days.  My following to followers ratio improved, but not in an "ideal" range yet.  I keep telling myself it won't matter once I break 1k, but I've got months before that happens.

Blogs:

The North Alabama Writers' Group blog is drowning in spam.  It's made me rethink everything I thought about how to judge a blog's success.  There was a time where a lot of comments on a blog amazed me, now I know that comments =/= traffic.  Our all time highest view rate is still 19 views and we're not even averaging 3 people visiting a day.  

 It's frustrating because we helpful content like the recent release of Calls for Submission in September but we also have reflective pieces like "Creating Aliens" by Christopher M. Palmer.  We even have crossover pieces like "What's in a Name—A Name I stole from Another Blog!" where I discuss my personal struggle to name characters and places WHILE ALSO offering resources to help other's find good names for their characters/places.

This blog's early numbers success has slumped a little.  It tells me posting on Tell All Tuesday, is very important to driving my traffic.  Good news, there is traffic.  Bad news, it's not worth talking about.

Unlike The North Alabama Writers' Group Blog, I know this blog doesn't have a lot of added value yet or "evergreen" blog fodder.  I am working on adding more.  I have scheduled posts that should improve traffic.

Writing Projects 

I've written more of the second/third/final draft of my novel Follow Me: Tatter Veils.  All forward motion is exciting.  I love this book more than I can express.

I've continued rearranging "Comes in Threes" and when I'm done with this short, I'm moving on to "1000 Words" (which will be 1000 words), and then I want to write one more flash.  Zach challenged me to write 3 flash pieces this week, and I'd like to have three in hand.  I'm toying with a step counter story called "The Tracker" or a reverse mortgage story that doesn't have a name.  All the ideas are sad and bittersweet.

Random Notes: 

My Goodreads reviews are up to date.  I'm half way through the next book on the list and hoping to finish reading/reviewing this week.

I have plenty ideas for the blog and hope to batch those together with the research and link work on Wed.

Batching is helpful, but it doesn't maximize efficiency as well as I'd thought.  For example, to get a sense of accomplishment from the work I need to write, edit, add links, and schedule each post before moving on to the next "job".   In an ideal batching scenario, I'd write all the blog rough drafts, then edit several posts, then place all the links for these posts together, and then find all the pictures.  I can't group the tasks that well yet.  Besides, that much editing all at once is exhausting.  Still there are benefits.  Being in "blog" mode increases speed of writing multiple posts.

Thanks for reading my update, tell me about how your own campaigns are going!  Are you seeing the growth you'd like on social media or on your blog?  What are you doing to achieve that growth?  Talk to me.

Want to see more related to this post?  See how far I've come from Aug 29th or earlier on Aug 21st.  

What's my strategy on Twitter?  Here's a post on the 8 Step Twitter Plan

Looking for the Larger Picture Check out Why a Twitter Campaign and Why a Blog at All

Artisans and Images that Just Aren't True

(from openclipart.org j4p4n's collection)

"I hate calling myself an artisan," the woman tells me.

I smile and nod because I think I understand.  Her ego is properly sized.  Calling oneself an artist of any kind seems pretentious to her.  It's an old story I'm ready to hear again even as I envy her the creative freedom, her ability to work from home, and the liberation from someone else's schedule set.

"I hardly call working on the same thing over and over again for 14 hours at a time an artisan thing," she continues.

My world halts.  The gears of the world pause for a moment as I consider her words.  It's never occurred to me that artisan could be the same as a small scale sweat shop.  I never considered that seamstresses or woodworkers even chose to make the same piece over and over again until it lost whatever little bit of soul it might have once had for the creator.

And I wonder is she as positively happy as I'd assumed anyone would be if they were "following their passion" or "had a skill that the market would support her to pursue".   As a thinker, a writer, and a researcher, I often envy others skills.  Even people just societally considered half a step above me like the artisan.   They after all, they can do what they love full time.  They must be deeply engrossed while I'm here behind the coffee bar handing off lattes and listening to small children tantrum while flustered mothers try to shop.

I'm so bored and quietly miserable--but here's the stay at home artisan in front of me and she's lonely and isolated.  Her hands hurt and her parents worry about her--just like mine.  She doesn't have time to explore interesting projects she'd like.  She just follows trends and has to keep making what is selling.  Yeah there are no screaming children and the rude people buying her stuff are in a store away from her--but she goes days without seeing another soul beyond her husband.  She's so busy at home that she can't cook a fresh meal.  Hot pockets are their go to lunch dinner and breakfast.

And I look at her--really look at her.  She's unkempt.  Her colored hair has about 5 inches of growth, it's falling down from it's low bun into a loose unruly mess.  Her black zip up sweat shirt is tattered, covered  in frayed edges, loose strings and random stains. There are bags under her clean make up free face.  Her build is sturdy but her husband stays close--is she about to fall over on her feet exhausted?

I see suddenly that we could be in the same place.  I write and I research for me and for art (which is so presumptuous to put down it makes me nervous to type) .  It's not my bread and butter.  How amazing would it be if one day  I wrote something took off and made money--but it's a distant dream.  I don't alter my writing to make it more marketable, not really.

Did she start the same way, making things because she loved it?  Did one or two things take off--forcing her to keep making more and more of the same thing over and over again because that's what people wanted?

This is how capitalism destroys us.  Here she is living what should be a dream, and other than scale, the work hours and some of the conditions are little better than sweat shops.  Does she work this hard to keep up with demand or because she needs to sell this much to keep herself a float?  Is this how she wants to live deep down and she's just hunting for some sympathy from me?

And here I am brewing her coffee and smiling all the while.  I'm only half listening to her, my mind is off in deep thoughts about what else I'll write for various blogs and whether or not my main character in my novel should show vulnerability and weakness.  I have her drawn up as an distrusting fight first kind of woman.  She's dragged along by her friends into a host of environments she finds distasteful--and I'm wondering if she needs to fall, even as she protests, to some of the dangers inherent in the scene.  Part of me doesn't want to open her up to the loss of control--as that's largely what I like about her--and part of me feels like it's so inevitable that people lose control in that the point of her succumbing would make that impact loudly and dramatically.

And how is me working on these elements in a book inherently less valuable than standing around in a coffee shop making small talk about the weather and other peoples' jobs?   Does everyone else in the system not feel as small and constricted as I do?

These are the questions we should be asking our culture and our society.  Are the things we value in line with what the culture demands for survival?  How do we define value or work?  What does it take to be more than a corporate cog--if one so desired--and is it feasible?

Performing For a Live Audience: And How it Can Stymie My Creative Process

(from openclipart.org j4p4n's collection)

The only thing worse than prolonged conversation with people when I need alone time, is performing in front of a large group of people.  Blogging and networking online forces me to do both, and thanks to all the ways to track views, the very meter of success forces me to acknowledge how many people I may be performing for.


The desire to create a good impression to so many people--whose expectations and experiences are so alien to me feels crippling.  I wake up early, planning to write three of four blog posts, and then to post one on each blog and suddenly I want no part in it.  I start picking up almost anything to avoid writing these posts.

This blog is a chance to go over parts of my process that I struggle in and am sensitive towards.  As everything seems clearer to me once I write it, it seems like it would be good to hash it out in works.  Yet, the very fact these are sensitive and troublesome aspects of my process keep me from wanting to post them.  This juxtaposition would be largely humorous if it wasn't standing between me and more success.

(from openclipart.org johnny_automatic's collection)

My less important Aquagarden Blog, that records more a hobby than anything that could be a career maker, still manages to create this feeling of anxiety.   I like taking the pictures of the tank and the plants.  I like being able to look back and see day to day growth compared.  And still, I see the 200 page views on 20 days of work, what most people would consider a pathetic turn out, and think it's too large.

 It concerns me to think of so many people looking at the blog and judging me with no more context than I've provided.  Part of me starts filling up all this supplemental reading and writing I should create to justify the blog.

Perhaps a betta 101 care post along with references to prove I'm taking good care of the fish. The whole post would only take three hours to research and write.  It would both prove my ability as a fish care taker and possibly increase traffic.

Then, I remember that how large a betta tank should be is a HUGE source of controversy, and I realize that will need it's own post.  For this I'd have to look up the varying opinions, analyze them and then integrate whatever scientific research there is on fish mental, physical, and emotional health.  This is minimum six hours.

Another point of controversy between the fish hobbiest community and the aquaponics community is exactly what kind of filtration system fish need and whether water changes need occur.  Honestly, I've done a good 30 hours research and can't give an answer to these questions.  I sort of just skim over them on the blog.  My tentative answer seems to be that plant roots can be a complete filtration system, but there are a lot of factors at work in my own tank--let alone what may be going on with others for me to truly answer this concern.

(from openclipart.org  bmichalik's collection)

And I've only scratched the surface of the fish side of the equation.  I'm already how many hours justifying a hobby blog where truly, we may not have an answer yet for some of the questions or concerns aquaponics raises.

Why do I feel so compelled to justify myself?  Why am I so nervous to just to put my thoughts or feelings out there?  What do I think is going to happen when people read my posts?  

I wish I could understand this crippling fear.  Never afraid to write, only afraid to present.   Still, I know if held me back from creating a new Aquagarden post for a week.  I had to force myself to take pictures I suddenly dreaded, look at my blogger account, and go through and post.

Likewise, here I have three posts I've started and abandoned.  One about what as an aspiring novelist I'm trying to create, one about race portrayals in fiction and creating responsible character diversity, and this current post I'm slogging through.  As the least controversial, it's easiest for me to share.  Why am I so afraid to get things wrong?

All I know is that of my three projects, I like my novel best because it goes out on paper completed.  There will be no addendum, no corrections, and no ongoing conversation as I create.  Sure there may be judgement and discussion on the final product, but it won't be the extended relationship that blogs and networking sites allow for.  Something in that format seems so much safer and more distanced.

On the other hand, I've spent a few years researching details for the novel--obsessed that even the smallest little pieces feel real and as if they're coming from a rich and vibrant tradition.  For all I know, it's less the judgement and more that I've allowed myself more time to do all the insane research so I feel more ready.  It's a shame the internet needs things to go too quickly to allow for the same level of in depth detail work.

Every Blog Needs a Intro: Welcome to My Current Projects and Obessions

(From openclipart.org j4p4n's collection)

Maybe other writers are more organized than me?  The ones I've met seem to be fairly scattered and spread thin.   I fit that mold well myself.  Reading writer's work and process often feels like roaming through my own inner mindscape.  It's very homey and insightful at the same time.  There's a lot of "I do that and I didn't even know why till now" or "I'll have to try that" or "Lucky me I'm not currently procrastinating on my project like this person is".

These blogs about the process along with gems of insight into how to make it all come together seem to be very popular--or at least popular in my circle.  I thought I'd try my hand at my own blog on my writing and project process.  If nothing else, I thought it might be fun and a perfect diversion from writing.  It's procrastination that I can pretend is productive or meaningful in some way
.

( from openclipart.org Fabuio's collection)

My writing and project work process is scattered at best.  I consider myself a pretty creative person, and I get a ton of interesting ideas that spawn more interesting ideas that spawn even more interesting ideas that then keep me up at night so I can neither sleep nor create anything because I'm soooo tired.

Then I go to my day job and think about all the progress I'm going to make on my totally cool awesome ideas when I get home.  This of course makes me scattered and irritated in dealing with customers while I sling coffee for a living.

(from openclipart.org jean_victor_balin's collection)

Just To Date Projects I'm working on Include:

1. A novel that's in it's fourth revision and about 20 pages short of an ending.

2. A Small scale aquaponics blog that dovetails very nicely into a larger outdoor model I'm studying to create--which doesn't sound creative but finding cheap supplies, thinking of different things to plant, and recording it all is a very creative process.

3. A blog responding to all the Kindle Unlimited Books that I'm reading.  Currently the blog is a template but I have about 20 articles sitting on my computer waiting for publishing to proceed.  Indeed, I was actually supposed to be posting there today when instead I decided start ranting in this blog that's been without any writing for about four months.

4.Learning Swift so I can make a writing related app.  This is going slowly because I hate learning the programming language and it's really very new, but I really like my app idea so I'm sticking it out at a few hours a week learning the junk.  I'd actually had an idea for a blog addressing changes in Swift 2.0 to Swift 1 and how to augment online free tutorials for the code changes--but I'm not that good at the coding yet and I don't want to spend more time with Swift than needed to have a pretty clean and sleek looking app.

5. This blog with project notes and thoughts.

(from openclipart.org j4p4n's collection)

Projects that Are on Hold or Dead in the Water:

1. My Barista to Boss blog.  The sad thing is I have about 7 posts edited and ready to go up, but I just couldn't take being so cheerful and happy about coffee and customers who as a general rule are terrible people.  Beyond that, I don't want to read any more about SEO or how to write a catchy post.  The experiment taught me a lot in how to get views.  It also reminded me that I'm not  social even on a computer screen and I need a lot more me time than networking was allowing.  I require a more slow and organic creation of online presence.  Preferably with one social media outlet.

2.  My children's book series.  I have two books written and illustrated with creative commons pictures.  I needed to revise them as each page was a little too busy and I needed to add a small dictionary in the back but otherwise the projects were a bright and colorful success.  I'm just not interesting in hawking them in the market.  I enjoy looking at them from time to time though.

3. A tarot card/ meditation series,  Was going to be active in this as it would generate interest potentially in my urban fantasy novel and be something fun to do, but 5 projects is more than I can handle already.  Plus swift is very time consuming and there's a lot of pressure to perform in that project from loved ones in my life.

4. Three vague novel ideas.  I'm waiting for the first to be complete and to have a few publishing inquiries in.

So how do I push through on these projects?  

My Aquagarden Blog is pretty simple.  As I'm here in my studio working I can see my fish tank and the green wheat grass going. It's physical presence reminds me to take a few pictures, upload and edit those pictures, and write a few words that come up off the top of my head on the tank's progress.  The visuals tell most of the story really.  Occasionally I have advice or a potentially helpful tip to add.

  Doing that usually brings a few questions to mind that I track down online or collect some research from amazon to look at later.  The whole process can be as brief as 30 minutes or as long at five hours depending on research and how much has changed in the tank.  As the tank stabilizes, my update will be fewer--though if I do end up setting up an outdoor aquaponics system this March, that blog may take off.

Since this project is mostly for my personal enjoyment I don't have to do a lot of selling on it.  Yes, I publish to my google+ feed and I tried to find some relevant communities.  It would be good if other people enjoyed my project or it inspired them to try their own gardening project, but the goal is just to record the tank's growth. I'm actually surprised with how many page views it has.

Swift is another fairly structured project.  Because my fiancee and my mother continually ask me about how this is going I sit down, schedule time and plug through it.  Also I'm not in the creating part yet as I'm still learning the programming language--I'm not even on how to program with the language yet.  Plus I keep learning notes and journal notes on how I feel about what I'm learning and sometimes how I imagine what I'm learning will work in creating my app.  Since I like to write so much that actually fuels my continued progress. I have a feeling this will stall some once I'm doing more than learning the basics and sketching potential App screens.  Who knows though, by then I might have it all worked out.

The real work--at least for me-- is going to be promoting my app and getting people using it.   I'm hoping that I'll have worked out some following somehow by then that will at least get people downloading it to play with it for a little bit.

My Kindle Unlimited project feels promising but isn't ready for presentation.  So I've spent the last three months reading like normal and writing feedback on my reading.  The main difference is that this reading and writing has all been focused on what books I can read through the Kindle Unlimited program.

This blog has the most potential to transform into money and networking gold.  Here I am reading and reviewing independent authors, the very thing I might become when publishing my novel.  These people could help me promote and sell my book.   Of course a major stumbling block here is that so far I hate the works by independent authors I've read and my reviews, when or if I post them are scathing.  That seems counter productive to my aims of making connections in the market.

Likewise, since my blog may help interest people in Kindle Unlimited, if I promoted correctly and had a high enough following, it might be a blog that amazon would notice and want to work with me on.  Maybe not, I mean Amazon is a huge company and little old me has never successfully created a blog with a crazy market changing following.  It's this potential that has me stymied on how best to proceed, because there are concrete things I'd like this blog to do along with just being a bit of fun.

Writing my novel comes in spurts.  The idea came to me in a dream, and I started writing it later that month.  The original outline  was written in out of order chapters--most of which I had to write but were scrapped in actual production.   I have a ton of bonus content though should readers enjoy my characters and writing style.

The serious work started in June this past year.  I actually took a week of work to churn out about 100 pages of content and finish the outline on what happens and how the characters get resolution.  I have two different people proof reading these efforts for me and I'm exploring agents and self publishing options.  Neither is going smoothly enough for me to feel confident.

I love my book.  I love the plot, I love the characters.  I love both the fantasy and real world elements.  I love the many different themes and messages in the work.  I love the hundred or so different things I'm trying to do and I love the prose tie it all together.  With all the heart, soul, and joy in creating this book, I need to invest equal quality in getting the book published and marketed.  I just don't love that side of the process as much at the writing part.  In fact I think approaching that part of the process has slowed down my writing.

This blog is a thought bubble, and so should be easy enough to produce.  I'm just sharing thoughts on my creation process and hoping they resonate with others.  As such a personal blog it shouldn't take extensive editing.  It shouldn't require very regular updates and it should have just as much promotion in it as I feel like putting in.  What will probably take the longest is finding and adding the clip art in to make it look more interesting and break up my writing.