I had a bad cold rolling into the launch of “Follow Me: Tattered Veils.” It kept me from being as active on social media as I’d planned. It kept me from feeling either excited or nervous. Most of me just wanted everything to be over. It felt like a slow grind towards an inevitable conclusion. I wasn’t even a little happy, and I don’t feel different now that we launched the book.
The one bright side to my illness is I also don’t feel let down. All this time I’ve been pushing for a strong release of “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” and bracing for silence. It’s been hard to stay so positive and strong while trying to keep expectations low. Realistically, only my friends, family, and husband’s friends/family will read or buy this book. And that stings because I’ve gone way out of my comfort zone to promote this book. I’ve spent a lot of time and energy trying to be friendly and charming and trying to find the right audience to enjoy my book. And I love “Follow Me: Tattered Veils” like it’s a living person and part of me feels like I’ve failed her. I’m like that parent that couldn’t figure out how their kid’s skill set could land them a successful career… or I saw that potential, but I couldn’t steer the kid in the right direction.
Now that I’m recovering from the cold, I feel like there’s all this lost time to make up for. I’ve got all these posts on writing and goals I have for 2020, and I haven’t hit most of them. I have to face it: I won’t meet a lot of my goals (writing and otherwise). And it’s leaving me feeling desperate to make up for lost time.
I’m anxious to write, and it’s been so long, the creative writing part of my brain feels rusty and misused.
So now you want me. When I was romping and playing in the background, shouting for you to stop and write, you didn’t have time or you felt too sick, but now you want me just to appear on demand. Well, good luck.
People talk about “recovering from the book launch” and I’m sitting here and laughing because I am literally recovering from being sick as much as the nerves of the launch and the pressure to be “on”. But some things I’m trying to keep in mind as I move forward:
1. Be kind to me. There’s stuff that’s fucked up this book and it’s too late to take it back. I need to forgive myself for any missteps or things I didn’t do or know to do for this launch.
2. Don’t linger. I need to get up and move the fuck on. I’ve got two major drafts I’m working on. I have a novella I’d love to find a sensitivity beta reader for and I would love love love love love to self publish it. I work a full-time job, I have a dog and a husband and I have all this work I want to do. I can’t wallow in lost time. And I can’t wait for my creative side to be ready, I might need to force it a little until I find my routine.
3. The book is out and published. Same way I didn’t wake up and have a complete novel ready to publish, I can’t expect people just come in to buy it. It will be a war of attrition to make back the money spent or to get people to read and enjoy the book.
4. It’s not 100% over. I have a few more promotional blogs to write/publish. AND starting March 15th I launch “Roxi’s Podcast” where I do a read along for “Follow Me: Tattered Veils.” My intentions are to reward early adopters of this story with some further insight into the creation and meaning of the story AND to entice some readers who are on the fence. My team and I pre-recorded most of the podcasts, but we have at least two or three more to record.
Looking for more posts about the writing and publishing process? Check out more posts on my novel publication process: Going Through Copy Edits, 1st Daft vs 2nd Draft, Goal Planning: Getting Through the First Draft, My Character Looks Nothing Like My MC, Cover Art: Truth in Advertising, and Post Book Launch: Reflections.
Want to know more about my novel? Check out my childhood stories recapping themes in my life I hope prepared me to write this book: Remember the Magic of Santa?, Closet Monsters: Gone too Far?, and Garden Gnomes and other Evils.
OR check out my series where I find similarities between my novel and other popular media. Hopefully it gives you a better idea whether there are elements in my book you may enjoy. Lost Girl Comparison, American Gods Comparison, and The O.A. Comparison.
MY BOOK IS AVAILABLE AT AMAZON!!! Please go look at "Follow Me: Tattered Veils" and see if it might be a story that interests you.